A Teething Puppy & 2 Exhausted Humans

If anyone with children tells me that I have no idea what it's like to be a parent, I'll probably clobber them over the head with a sharp, blunt object and probably utter some very un-ladylike words. I'm on puppy number 2 of my adult life, and frankly, raising a puppy, in my opinion, can be just as challenging as raising a child. (In some ways, I'm pretty sure that a child would be easier- after all you can't diaper an unhousebroken puppy- okay, you could... I shouldn't complain though, Lucy was VERY easy to housebreak!)

My little boxer is teething. And there's no other way to describe this period in her life other than a complete, utter hell- if not for her, then definitely for her humans. At least 100 times a day, I find an adorable little boxer charging at my feet, ready to devour. And it's not just my feet, she'll happily chew on my elbows, fingers, ears, and even decided the other day that my nose looked very nibble worthy.

The last 3 nights in our house, the only one that's gotten sleep of any quality has been the German shepherd. Lucy has been the model well behaved, calm boxer puppy at work with me all day. But, the minute her exhausted, overworked parents hit that bed, she turns in to the Tazmanian Devil. She doesn't sit in one place for more than 3 minutes, she's on top of me, on top of Rob, yanking at the covers, jumping down off the bed (and last night she drank for 5 minutes out of the toilet in the master bath- much to her human's complete dismay! Are you kidding Lucy? That's just gross!)

Tuesday night, I got up with her at least 5 times. I had no idea what to do with her. I thought she was too hot, so I ventured downstairs (stepping on a neglected meat bone- "What the hell was that?", screaming at the top of my lungs and feeling like my foot might require immediate medical attention) and turned the AC down to 65 degrees, returned to the bedroom and my extremely hyper boxer puppy to turn on the ceiling fan. Rob looks at me and says, " Have you lost your mind? It's freezing in here!" I shrug, and tell him that I haven't seen my mind in at least 2 years and tell him that I thought he would have noticed by now. But, she just wouldn't stop crying, and when she started nibbling on Rob's head (yes, I said "head"), I gave up and declared myself befuddled. This was around 2 A.M. I considered giving her some Benedryl, but would have felt guilty for days over giving her medication that she really didn't need, so I had no choice but to suffer right along with Lucy.

Wednesday night, thankfully I had ammo- there was one real meat bone left in the fridge. When I looked at the clock at 2:45, I could still hear Lucy chewing. What to do? If Rob and I don't get some sleep soon, we're going to be even more incoherant than what we already are... (And of course, she's sleeping now! AAGH!)

Last night, she decided that she wanted to go out and play- at 12:45 (this was after the incident which completely emptied all water out of our toilet). So, being the good puppy parent that I struggle to be- I went with her- choosing my steps very carefully in the very dark, very poop covered back yard- why didn't I put slippers on for this late night stroll? She had found something in the yard that had her total and undivided attention. (I could only imagine- a week ago, I found Lucy in the yard gnawing on an animal skeleton of some kind- I still have no idea what that was or where she found it. All I know was that it looked very, very ancient! But, I'll share with you that I was completely grossed out!) Last night, it was a long piece of that weed wacker cord that she tried so hard to help her Daddy with a few weeks ago. Where did you find that, Lucy?

I would have thought that Lucy would have been tired after all of the activities that she and I engaged in last evening.

Yesterday morning, just as we were getting ready to get out of the hot tub- it started making a terrible noise. Rob turned off the jets, and I couldn't believe that I had just spent the last hour sitting in that water! It was disgusting- there were things floating all over the place that I couldn't even begin to identify and some that I could (not that being able to identify these things that I had just spent the last hour soaking in made it any easier), and when climbed out and pulled the filter cover- I got even more disturbed.

Needless to say, when Lucy and I got home last night my first priority was to clean out that filter. Lucy was pretty sure it was a game, and it took me about 30 minutes to clean out the filter because Lucy thought all that water coming out of the hose was for her. I don't mind that it took that long, it was extremely entertaining. She made what was going to be a horrible job, very giggle worthy.

A few hours later, Lucy appeared on the deck steps completely black! Yup, she found that swamp again. I guess all those rocks that I drug in there made no difference- and of course, I haven't won the battle with putting a sheet of something over it. So, I ventured back outside to hose Lucy down- promising to dry her off immediately. We made a game out of it, and Rob stood in the doorway laughing at his 2 girls. (Laughing at me because I am so insistent on keeping Lucy clean- and laughing at Lucy because she was being so ridiculously silly!)